Haven’t Quit Yet

But when I do, I want this up and running. 

feel free to drop in at my personal blog:  www.zyriana.com

First Day – again

I just wrote this long post and hit “publish” and it lost it.  I’ll just make sure I keep hitting “save” along the way this time.  Sheesh.

So here’s the skinny thus-far.  I have to write it or I will forget.

• November 24th, 2006 – December 23rd, 2006 – stopped smoking for ALMOST a month
• December 24th, 2006 – bought cigs as I was having extreme emotional issues, and didn’t want to fight anymore – yes, caved.  argh
• December 24th, 2006 – January 5th, 2007 – smoked
• January 5th 5:00 PM – January 6th 11:50 am – didn’t smoke
• January 6th 11:50 – after DH (darling husband) left I immediately went outside and had a cig. 
• January 6th 11:50 AM to current – no smoke, and solidified my desire to quit

Thoughts:

• First of all I noticed I did not prepare myself like I did last time.  I spent a week before reading everything I could get my hands on, inundating myself with knowledge.  Also, I spent the whole prior week reading through the forum on About.com so jumping in there when I quit was seemless and they helped me tremendously.  I didn’t do that this time, as it looked like I was just playing around – so I stayed off the internet.  Didn’t read.  Etc.
• Second, after the slip today came WAY too easilly – I fortified my resolve by creating a bit of a “sanctuary” out of my room like I did last time.  Candles lit, all my STUFF in here should I decide I don’t have enough to do. 
• Thought of “what do I do when’s”.  So that each craving will be handled without caving.  One of the big one’s I’ve already used in just three hours was the hot tub.  OMG.  Cigs give you a kinda “calm down” when things are stressful, or the reward to caving into a craving.  So I wondered what I could do to give me a refressing “calm down”.  That came in the form of my hot tub.   Beautiful day outside and I slipped into the 102 degree YUMMY hot tub.  Oh yeah, now THAT’s a reward. 
• Drinking more water than I did the last time I did this.  AND orange juice as well.  It’s good!  Oh, and took a vitamin that I was going to do the last time and didn’t.   So I made some improvements over my last quit as well.

I’m nice and tired now.  Gonna take a nap before the DH gets home - he’s supportive and I appreciate all he is doing.

Mon out 

3 hours, 57 minutes and 34 seconds. 3 icky cigarettes not smoked, saving $0.95. Precious time of my life saved: 15 minutes.

Quit Date Coming Around the Corner

Friday is almost here.  I’m getting nervous because I’m not as focused as I was last quit.  Wednesday I’ll have the to do to be sure all is done.  That way I have Thursday in case I need to get something.

Hateful Things

Some of the things I hate about smoking:

1. I stink
2. My mouth is dry
3. I have a headache
4. It makes me sick to my stomache
5. I am embarassed to smoke
6. It controls me
7. It makes my kids scared of my health
8. It makes me scared of my health
9. It’s so cold and windy outside and I go outside and freeze to smoke
10. I can’t smell much
11. My taste is not what it was a few weeks ago
12. I am going to go through those horrible withdrawls AGAIN!
13. Not smoking makes me cranky after I quit
14. My skin looks different
15. It makes me mad something controls me

Quitting Smoking

Interestingly I’ve been trying to quit for over 17 years. Not firmly I suppose or I would have been quit. But, I’ve hated it none the less.

This will be the area I use to journal what I am going through, or what I am going through or even future thoughts.

Love and Light to anyone who’s in the same group as me – a Quitter or one who is in the process of quitting.

I rely heavilly on an awesome support group online at About.com. I’ll post the link as soon as I get this journal runnin’.